This is what you get when my husband isn’t here to listen to me vent…

Since I’m all about the honesty lately, I should probably fess up to something that isn’t going to make me hugely popular on the Mommyblog Circuit. Or most other circuits that involve people being ‘nice’.

I read Violent Acres. Yes….that Violent Acres.

*ducks to dodge rotten vegetables and/or dishes and/or small appliances.*

I can’t remember how I found her. It seems to be one of those blogs that people either absolutely love or absolutely hate. There have been many times when I’ve sworn it off forever because she’s written something that I vehemently disagree with.

But then I eventually tire of the “omg, lookit my cute baby!” “I got the greatest jeans on clearance at the mall today!” “If I have to watch that same episode of Dora one more time…” (you know, pretty much the same old boring shit you read here on my blog!) and find my way back to see if she’s said anything interesting since my last visit. And she usually has.

Yes, she can be really damn mean. There have been times when her posts have made me see red from anger, get sick to my stomach with disgust, or both. But then there are times when I really agree with what she’s saying. Like when she talks about how it is the parent’s responsibility, not the government’s, to pay for their children. I’m not anti-social programs, nor am I against people who use them when they need it. What I am against is people who use welfare as their retirement program. My own mother included.

My husband and I are benevolent people. We have often donated time, money, or other items to people in need. Most of the time we do so anonymously, because we’re not looking to take credit. My heart goes out to people in difficult situations who can’t make ends meet. I have been there. I know it’s hard. I have been a single mom. A single mom who got zero dollars in child support or daycare assistance or food stamps. I worked a full-time job. I didn’t have a lot to show for it. I didn’t have my own computer with internet service, cable tv, or a cell phone. Hell, I didn’t even have a land line. But I survived, so I know it can be done. If people would just quit making excuses and do something about their own situations.

And no, I don’t have a paying job now. I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to stay at home and raise my children. But my husband works hard to support us. He puts in at least 50 hours every week at his job, and I put in a lot of hours every week trying to make his money go as far as I can. We still don’t have a lot. Yes, we could tighten our budget a bit more than it is. But it is our money.

I guess what I’m saying is that it pisses me off that my husband has to work so hard to provide for his family, while other people don’t have the same attitude. It’s great that you want to stay at home, too. But if you can’t afford to do so without taxpayer money being figured as your permanent income, it’s not a good idea. It pisses me off that other husbands get to do their “calling” for 20-ish hours a week and have no qualms about letting the government cover the gap. You’ve found your calling? Wonderful. Go for it. But you should probably pick up another job on the side if that’s what you need to do to support your wife and kids. Because it sure as hell isn’t my husband’s responsibility to provide for your family year after year. I don’t think that living off the government counts as “living by faith”. It also isn’t his responsibility to pay for your cell, cable, internet and designer clothes. Which, duh…no shit that stuff doesn’t get paid for directly from social programs, but if you can afford to pay out-of-pocket for those items, you should be able to pay for your own food, child care and living expenses out of your own pocket as well.

(Yes, I most certainly am venting because I personally know someone like this and it’s really triggering me at the moment. But that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.)

I’ll be better in 9 days, 14 hours, and 48 minutes. Ish.